words and music by Tim Burke
Don’t want no Ruskies
We’ve kicked out all the hags.
Sent home the homeless
In their dirty old rags.
Just give me the Cleavers and my three sons
They know how to have good clean fun.
Next door live Patty and Cathy
Who already look alike.
So who needs foreigners
They can all go take a hike.
Across the street dear Ozzie
And Harriet and all the rest
Won’t tolerate no long hairs
Cause father knows best.
(chorus)
I, I am an old tv
Black and white is all I see
If it isn’t good or bad, either wrong or right
Adjust the horizontal till it’s out of sight
I, I am an old tv.
We read the good book
No room for Godless trash
And here in Petticoat Junction
You won’t see no workers clash.
With the Flying Nun
And Sky King overhead.
We’re safe from all the world now
Snug in our own beds.
(bridge)
See no evil, hear no evil, say no evil Amen
Adjust the horizontal, change the channel once again.
See no evil -- change the channel.
Hear no evil -- change the channel.
Say no evil -- change the channel.
Amen.
(chorus)